You’ve made the plunge to pick up the phone, call a few therapy offices and attempt to determine why your relationship feels distant and conflictual. Often times, couples become trapped in what Drs John and Julie Gottman of Gottman Method Couples Therapy (GMCT) refer to as, the attack-defend cycle. Preemptive to that, you may experience defensiveness, blame, and one or the other of you shutting down and emotionally withdrawing. She wants to know why you are late coming home (again) and he despises that she only notices late days and not when he is timely, therefore the couple finds themselves placing blame, attempting to find fault, and with no solution.
May 12, 2023
There is a common belief that affairs, physical or emotional happen to marriages that were doomed from the beginning. There was a time in history when social psychologists believed affairs happened due to high expectations. Lower your expectations and you’ll live a life of a fulfilled relationship. Researchers have discovered what we now see as […]
August 8, 2023
On the day you chose to marry your spouse, it is unlikely that you ever thought for better or for worse would mean betrayal. Statistically speaking, marital dissatisfaction is not significantly correlated with infidelity. In other words, you can be in a generally pleasant marriage and still experience infidelity. So let’s talk about what to […]
July 24, 2023
When I entered into the field of mental health almost 10 years ago, I knew that I wanted to offer a unique approach to the counseling room. One that did not ignore the realities of living in a very real, very present world (“…in this world you will have trouble…”John 16:33) but an approach that […]
July 14, 2023